After a long week of classes there’s simply nothing better than putting the ‘G’ in GTL. Wait, so Jersey Shore references are NOT cool anymore? Let me start over then.
One of students favorite places around campus is the beloved Burdick Gym. Today, we pay tribute to our workout hotspot by giving you 8 characters you are likely to see on any given day in Burdick.
1. The Strong Girl
Okay who’s the girl over there standing by the bench press? Like, who does she think she is, everyone knows that girls use the cardio machines and guys do the free weights and YOU DON’T MESS WITH THE SYSTEM. I mean wha- holy crap she’s doing it… I can’t even do that much. At this point you don’t know whether to be impressed or if you want to cry. Probably cry though.
2. The Professor
Ahh, nothing like getting to the gym nice and early to beat the crowds. There are literally three people here and wait… is that… yep that’s Dr. Lowry, your Bio Professor. The guy is in his 50’s and he’s still hitting the gym. Wow, good for him! At this point you’ve got a good amount of respect for the guy and everything is going pretty cool until he asks you to spot him. “Hey bud you mind giving me a spot? Your grade depends on it… No just kidding.” But seriously.
3. The Hulk
Alright, we get it dude. You’re the strongest guy here, congratulations. This guy is 250 pounds of pure man muscle and knows exactly which weight supplement to suggest depending on if you’re going for bulk or tone. But get it through your head, we’re not staring at you because you’re so strong, we’re staring at you because you’re still here. Go home and do something productive. You won.
4. The Enforcer
“Hey bro, you gonna wipe that down?” This guy may not work here but he sure does know every single one of the gym rules. Okay, whatever, so he’s just trying to make the gym a better place but when your definition of social responsibility is racking your weights when you’re done you might need to prioritize. This guy will also probably be your kid’s PE teacher in fifteen years.
5. The Hot Girl
Don’t stare, don’t stare, don’t- oh my god this angel on the elliptical is driving you crazy. But hey, no better place to impress a girl that the gym, right? WRONG! It doesn’t matter how many times you can curl those 25’s, this girl isn’t going to pay you any mind. It’s okay though because you’re about to take a treadmill in the second row and have the best seat in the house. Score!
6. The Motivator
“C’mon baby one more rep, LET’S GET THIS!” You don’t know this guy but man has he got you feeling like the real deal. Giving out compliments and high fives and- whoa hey man watch the butt! He might actually be here alone and honestly I don’t think he’s touched a weight yet. He’s actually getting a little creepy but his kind, motivational cliches are priceless in the gym, and for that we thank him.
7. The Sweaty Guy
Were you just in the pool? How long have you been here? WHAT IS GOING ON!!?? You have so many questions for this ripped, dripping son-of-a-gun but his ears are clogged with sweat so he wouldn’t hear you anyway. Now you’ve never been confused with the enforcer before, but seriously… that guy should probably wipe his seat down when he’s done.
This is just your second time here this week but that’s okay. Yeah we all remember how you vowed to come Monday through Friday weekly at the beginning of the semester; three days of weights, two days of cardio, right? But you’re here now and that is all that matters. All you need to worry about is getting a solid exercise session to burn off all those PAWS pretzel sandwiches. Oh, and also don’t look The Hulk in the eye. Not Kidding.
This article wouldn’t be complete without a special shoutout to Campus Recreation Services! Look them up at http://www.towson.edu/campusrec/index.html and don’t forget to stop by Burdick for any of your athletic needs!!!
And remember Towson: “Here at Burdick Gym, we’re better than you, and we know it”